Align seller expectations with market realities

Suze Cumming, founder of The Nature of Real Estate and Canada’s Real Estate Negotiation guru, answers Realtors’ questions on the first Friday of the month about negotiation tactics and working through tricky situations. Have a question for Suze? Send her an email.

An offer arrives significantly below asking. The buyer’s agent is reluctant to cooperate, and your seller client, frustrated and defensive, flatly refuses to consider it. The home has sat on the market for over two months, your sellers urgently need to close on their new property within six weeks, and there are no other interested buyers in sight.

What’s your next move?

Welcome back to Negotiation Intelligence, your monthly resource dedicated to elevating your negotiation expertise and professional impact in real estate.

One of the greatest frustrations I consistently hear from agents is managing unrealistic price expectations—sellers often want too much; buyers offer too little.

But isn’t that precisely why negotiations—and why skilled, professional real estate agents—exist? Our value lies precisely in navigating these complex emotional landscapes to achieve outcomes clients can’t reach on their own.

Negotiations are challenging because most clients, and, frankly, many agents, haven’t had specialized training in these critical skills. As a result, they often default to rigid tactics, silence, or ineffective standoffs that rarely yield desired outcomes.

If pricing discussions were purely logical, sophisticated AI systems could easily handle them. But here’s the crucial truth: studies show roughly 80-90 per cent of real estate and financial decisions are emotionally driven, with logic serving primarily as justification afterward. 

Research by Nobel Prize-winning psychologist Daniel Kahneman supports this, revealing that about 90 per cent of financial decisions are emotion-based. Our role as Realtors extends far beyond delivering market data; it’s about guiding our clients toward clear, confident decisions that genuinely align with their best interests by understanding their emotions and motivations.

Mastering this skill set requires emotional intelligence, refined communication, and expert self-awareness. The good news? These are learnable skills, and the payoff in terms of trust, reputation, and personal fulfillment is tremendous.

Today, let’s tackle the scenario above, giving you tools you can use immediately and insights to start expanding your negotiation toolkit.

A playbook for managing untenable seller expectations

In this challenging situation, you face two distinct hurdles: a seller whose stance risks significant financial consequences, and a buyer’s agent who is disengaged. Both are familiar struggles, but let’s discuss the seller situation today. 

First, understand that your seller’s frustration and defensiveness come from a genuine place of fear and uncertainty. Adding pressure or urgency typically exacerbates their resistance. Instead, your initial goal is to build trust, lower stress levels, and create a safe environment where authentic dialogue can take place.

Here’s a practical framework you can implement immediately:

1. Acknowledge their reality: “I completely understand why this offer is disappointing. It’s not what you were hoping for, and I get that.” Remember, you are not necessarily agreeing with them—you’re simply letting them know that you understand and empathize with their situation.  This will give them the space to stop defending their position. 
2. Support their autonomy: “My goal isn’t to push you into accepting an offer you’re uncomfortable with. My role is to support you, no matter what decision you make. It’s important to me that you have all of the essential and accurate information required for this critical decision.”
3. Shift to solution-based questions: “Given our tight timeline, if you decide this offer isn’t acceptable, what’s your best alternative? What other options do we have to protect you financially?”

This approach immediately signals empathy, builds trust, and gently guides your client toward seeing the bigger picture without sacrificing their autonomy. It demonstrates professional competence and emotional understanding, positioning you as a trusted advisor rather than an adversary.

I recently worked with an agent who used this exact approach.  Her sellers initially rejected an offer $50,000 below asking.  After a 20-minute conversation using these techniques, they not only engaged with the offer but also discovered the buyers had flexibility on closing dates, ultimately saving the sellers $15,000 in bridge financing costs.  

Negotiations are opportunities—opportunities to show clients that you’re not only professionally capable but deeply human. Your ability to navigate challenging emotions and complex conversations will set you apart in this evolving market.  Agents who master these skills earn 40 per cent more in commission because they close deals that others can’t.  

Coming next

Each month in this column, we’ll delve deeper into real-world scenarios, offering tangible strategies you can adopt right away. You absolutely can master these nuanced skills, and when you do, you’ll find negotiation not only more successful but also more satisfying and rewarding.

Next month, we’ll cover how to handle the buyer’s agent’s avoidance in this negotiation, along with other challenging cooperative-agent situations. Have you noticed how often the other agent can be our greatest impediment to a successful transaction? We’ll go deep on the psychological triggers and negotiation strategies that turn reluctant buyer agents into collaborative partners.

I’m genuinely excited to join you on this journey. If you have challenging negotiation scenarios you would like me to address (anything except lead generation—seriously!), please reach out. Together, we’ll elevate your negotiation intelligence and empower you to thrive, one meaningful conversation at a time.